Comments on: The Negative Side of Positive Thinking http://revellian.com/2008/07/23/the-negative-side-of-positive-thinking/ Thoughts and Fiction of Bobby Revell Thu, 20 Oct 2011 16:27:02 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Kelly http://revellian.com/2008/07/23/the-negative-side-of-positive-thinking/comment-page-1/#comment-20329 Kelly Sat, 06 Jun 2009 03:29:21 +0000 http://revellian.com/?p=394#comment-20329 Our boss sends us daily quotes via email. At first I couldn't really pinpoint why they bugged me, but I always found myself getting irritated with them. I finally decided that "positive thinking" is just a way for those in charge to keep their underlings in line. Hit us with lots of positive thinking talk, and then when they introduce something new we don't like -even for a good reason - they can just say we're "negative thinkers that can't handle change if we complain. Anyway, thought you'd like to read a few of these teethgrinding one liners, so here goes: The greatest part of our happiness or misery depends on our dispositions and not our circumstances… Change is a challenge and an opportunity, not a threat… Forget past mistakes. Forget failures. Forget everything except what you’re going to do now and do it… Even if you’re on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there… The first step towards change is acceptance…change is not something you do, it’s something you allow… Change is often rejuvenating, invigorating, fun…and necessary. The secret to happiness is not in doing what one likes to do, but in liking what one has to do… I can take a few of these, but after a while I start wishing I could send negative one-liners back to her like: Change sucks unless your the one in charge of making it happen! Thanks for giving me an opportunity to "dump" about this here. What a relief! Maybe I'll make a quote about it........... Our boss sends us daily quotes via email. At first I couldn’t really pinpoint why they bugged me, but I always found myself getting irritated with them. I finally decided that “positive thinking” is just a way for those in charge to keep their underlings in line. Hit us with lots of positive thinking talk, and then when they introduce something new we don’t like -even for a good reason – they can just say we’re “negative thinkers that can’t handle change if we complain. Anyway, thought you’d like to read a few of these teethgrinding one liners, so here goes:

The greatest part of our happiness or misery depends on our dispositions and not our circumstances…

Change is a challenge and an opportunity, not a threat…

Forget past mistakes. Forget failures. Forget everything except what you’re going to do now and do it…

Even if you’re on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there…

The first step towards change is acceptance…change is not something you do, it’s something you allow…

Change is often rejuvenating, invigorating, fun…and necessary.

The secret to happiness is not in doing what one likes to do, but in liking what one has to do…

I can take a few of these, but after a while I start wishing I could send negative one-liners back to her like:

Change sucks unless your the one in charge of making it happen!

Thanks for giving me an opportunity to “dump” about this here. What a relief! Maybe I’ll make a quote about it………..

]]> By: Justin Airsoft http://revellian.com/2008/07/23/the-negative-side-of-positive-thinking/comment-page-1/#comment-16046 Justin Airsoft Sat, 27 Dec 2008 21:36:22 +0000 http://revellian.com/?p=394#comment-16046 That was such a great post. You're right, all humans have both sides of good and evil, but some have it in different ratios. I don't believe that we are equally good and evil, but it is for sure that nobody is pure on either side. That was such a great post. You’re right, all humans have both sides of good and evil, but some have it in different ratios. I don’t believe that we are equally good and evil, but it is for sure that nobody is pure on either side.

]]> By: Mr. Grateful http://revellian.com/2008/07/23/the-negative-side-of-positive-thinking/comment-page-1/#comment-14999 Mr. Grateful Thu, 27 Nov 2008 06:23:30 +0000 http://revellian.com/?p=394#comment-14999 About two hours ago I came home from a kick boxing class. One of the reasons that I took this class was to help me release feelings anger and frustration that I feel that I have difficulty expressing. Tonight was the last class. I missed the previous three classes prior. I attended most classes prior to this. I think of myself as a committed and active student. I forgot one of my boxing gloves in my car tonight. So I wasn’t able to spar with my peers. Angry and frustrated I chose to sit on the side and refused to participate any further. I was angry could be. I started to pack up my belongings fully aware that it was the last class. One guy encouraged me to stay, “Don’t punish yourself because you forgot your glove! You’ve come this far, don’t quit now he said”. “I’m too proud to stay and sit watching from the side I responded.” I felt I looked silly sitting there while everyone participated. I left! I drove home feeling angry and disappointed at myself. Here we go again you gave up yet again on something that you love and enjoy I thought to myself. Now I am sitting at home feeling angry and feeling that giving up or quitting when I am faced with challenges or difficulties seems to be how I cope lately. How can positive thinking help me now that I feel angry towards myself? So I made a bad decision, deep inside there is something in me that feels good about my decision because I will probably make a whole lot more. I want to be comfortable with making bad decisions if that makes any sense? The truth is I am somewhat happy that I left. I missed the closing or wrap up speech that the instructor probably gave after the class. Perhaps his words would have encouraged me to return next year or to excel in other areas of my life. Who knows? What I know now is that I made a decision and whether it was the right or wrong one I have to deal with the consequences of my actions. I am not suggesting that individuals should strive to make negative decisions. Initially I blamed myself for making a bad decision and this caused me to feel upset and angry at myself feeling like I was a failure and that this was who I am on a whole. I refuse to believe that. I acknowledge that I wanted to be at that class until the end but I wasn’t because I made a decision to leave because I was too proud to sit and wait for another opportunity to participate without gloves and because I was too concerned about looking silly on the side. The lesson I have learned tonight is that I am not a quitter or a loser. I have succeeded in many other areas of my life. If I fail at one or a few things; then I will learn to accept failure and I will not allow this to prevent me from trying harder next time. But for now, tonight; I give myself permission to make a mistake. I accept responsibility for the decisions I make and I will learn from them. Reveillan, in your article, “The Negative Side of Positive Thinking”, you encourage the reader to, “to embrace the concept that we are all both positive and negative.” This encourages me to embrace the concept that I will make bad and good decisions. I accept this. After reading your article I gave myself permission to believe that perhaps the “negative decisions” I make could be functional depending on whether or not I learn from them.” I feel fortunate to have found your article. It is an interesting and refreshing perspective that negativity can have a balancing or functional effect. I encourage myself to learn and be both critical yet open minded in all aspects of life. I am optimistic that eventually I will express my feelings of anger or frustration once I feel comfortable to share this with someone who will simply listen and understand. About two hours ago I came home from a kick boxing class. One of the reasons that I took this class was to help me release feelings anger and frustration that I feel that I have difficulty expressing. Tonight was the last class. I missed the previous three classes prior. I attended most classes prior to this. I think of myself as a committed and active student. I forgot one of my boxing gloves in my car tonight. So I wasn’t able to spar with my peers. Angry and frustrated I chose to sit on the side and refused to participate any further. I was angry could be. I started to pack up my belongings fully aware that it was the last class. One guy encouraged me to stay, “Don’t punish yourself because you forgot your glove! You’ve come this far, don’t quit now he said”. “I’m too proud to stay and sit watching from the side I responded.” I felt I looked silly sitting there while everyone participated. I left! I drove home feeling angry and disappointed at myself. Here we go again you gave up yet again on something that you love and enjoy I thought to myself. Now I am sitting at home feeling angry and feeling that giving up or quitting when I am faced with challenges or difficulties seems to be how I cope lately.

How can positive thinking help me now that I feel angry towards myself? So I made a bad decision, deep inside there is something in me that feels good about my decision because I will probably make a whole lot more. I want to be comfortable with making bad decisions if that makes any sense? The truth is I am somewhat happy that I left. I missed the closing or wrap up speech that the instructor probably gave after the class. Perhaps his words would have encouraged me to return next year or to excel in other areas of my life. Who knows? What I know now is that I made a decision and whether it was the right or wrong one I have to deal with the consequences of my actions. I am not suggesting that individuals should strive to make negative decisions. Initially I blamed myself for making a bad decision and this caused me to feel upset and angry at myself feeling like I was a failure and that this was who I am on a whole. I refuse to believe that. I acknowledge that I wanted to be at that class until the end but I wasn’t because I made a decision to leave because I was too proud to sit and wait for another opportunity to participate without gloves and because I was too concerned about looking silly on the side.

The lesson I have learned tonight is that I am not a quitter or a loser. I have succeeded in many other areas of my life. If I fail at one or a few things; then I will learn to accept failure and I will not allow this to prevent me from trying harder next time. But for now, tonight; I give myself permission to make a mistake. I accept responsibility for the decisions I make and I will learn from them.
Reveillan, in your article, “The Negative Side of Positive Thinking”, you encourage the reader to, “to embrace the concept that we are all both positive and negative.” This encourages me to embrace the concept that I will make bad and good decisions. I accept this. After reading your article I gave myself permission to believe that perhaps the “negative decisions” I make could be functional depending on whether or not I learn from them.” I feel fortunate to have found your article. It is an interesting and refreshing perspective that negativity can have a balancing or functional effect. I encourage myself to learn and be both critical yet open minded in all aspects of life. I am optimistic that eventually I will express my feelings of anger or frustration once I feel comfortable to share this with someone who will simply listen and understand.

]]> By: Revellian http://revellian.com/2008/07/23/the-negative-side-of-positive-thinking/comment-page-1/#comment-8213 Revellian Fri, 25 Jul 2008 23:59:56 +0000 http://revellian.com/?p=394#comment-8213 @Eric: If I could be hysterically happy 24-7, I guess I would be. I'll bet someone would shoot me! I tend to stay basically neutral most of the time, though I really don't think about it. Thinking too much is what gets you :smile: @Marzie: Sometimes, nothing feels better than complaining and telling someone how it is...haha! Usually when I get mad or irritated, it ends up being funny somehow and everyone gets over it. I don't like holding things in. Have a good weekend too! :smile: @Eric: If I could be hysterically happy 24-7, I guess I would be. I’ll bet someone would shoot me! I tend to stay basically neutral most of the time, though I really don’t think about it. Thinking too much is what gets you :smile:

@Marzie: Sometimes, nothing feels better than complaining and telling someone how it is…haha! Usually when I get mad or irritated, it ends up being funny somehow and everyone gets over it. I don’t like holding things in. Have a good weekend too! :smile:

]]> By: Genie Princess http://revellian.com/2008/07/23/the-negative-side-of-positive-thinking/comment-page-1/#comment-8096 Genie Princess Fri, 25 Jul 2008 05:21:11 +0000 http://revellian.com/?p=394#comment-8096 Afternoon Bobby! I'd like to think of myself as having a balance too. There's good Mariuca and evil Mariuca, one without the other just won't work! ;) It's already Friday here, so have a good weekend to you. :) Afternoon Bobby! I’d like to think of myself as having a balance too. There’s good Mariuca and evil Mariuca, one without the other just won’t work! ;)

It’s already Friday here, so have a good weekend to you. :)

]]> By: Eric "SpeedyCat" http://revellian.com/2008/07/23/the-negative-side-of-positive-thinking/comment-page-1/#comment-8075 Eric "SpeedyCat" Fri, 25 Jul 2008 02:12:01 +0000 http://revellian.com/?p=394#comment-8075 I think the difference is whether you "try" to be on one side or the other. Some people are just negative all the time - and seem to like it that way. I had to leave many friends behind when I stopped drinking. To my surprise, as I looked at myself with discerning eyes, my life had been spent negatively looking at everything, and I didn't even realize it. It might be nice to always be positive, but humans aren't able to accomplish that anyway!! I think the difference is whether you “try” to be on one side or the other. Some people are just negative all the time – and seem to like it that way.
I had to leave many friends behind when I stopped drinking. To my surprise, as I looked at myself with discerning eyes, my life had been spent negatively looking at everything, and I didn’t even realize it.

It might be nice to always be positive, but humans aren’t able to accomplish that anyway!!

]]> By: Revellian http://revellian.com/2008/07/23/the-negative-side-of-positive-thinking/comment-page-1/#comment-8070 Revellian Fri, 25 Jul 2008 01:46:56 +0000 http://revellian.com/?p=394#comment-8070 Thanks Leigh! I'll have to check that series out :smile: Thanks Leigh! I’ll have to check that series out :smile:

]]> By: Leigh http://revellian.com/2008/07/23/the-negative-side-of-positive-thinking/comment-page-1/#comment-8059 Leigh Fri, 25 Jul 2008 00:17:34 +0000 http://revellian.com/?p=394#comment-8059 You talk about everything in life having a balance, which is so true! If you're an avid reader, you may want to find the Sword of Truth series books by Terry Goodkind. The views seem much the same as yours, and it's a great series. You talk about everything in life having a balance, which is so true!

If you’re an avid reader, you may want to find the Sword of Truth series books by Terry Goodkind. The views seem much the same as yours, and it’s a great series.

]]> By: Revellian http://revellian.com/2008/07/23/the-negative-side-of-positive-thinking/comment-page-1/#comment-8032 Revellian Thu, 24 Jul 2008 21:00:37 +0000 http://revellian.com/?p=394#comment-8032 Thanks JC! If you take a person who has lots of negative personality disorders and have them read several self help, positive thinking books, it can actually be detrimental and have a negative effect. Personally, I don't want to be happy 24-7 if that makes any sense. Thanks JC! If you take a person who has lots of negative personality disorders and have them read several self help, positive thinking books, it can actually be detrimental and have a negative effect. Personally, I don’t want to be happy 24-7 if that makes any sense.

]]> By: J.C. http://revellian.com/2008/07/23/the-negative-side-of-positive-thinking/comment-page-1/#comment-8031 J.C. Thu, 24 Jul 2008 20:54:38 +0000 http://revellian.com/?p=394#comment-8031 You've definitely hit the bulls eye with this one Bobby. Your post have reminded me of Walt Whitman's verse where he said that he had accepted both - good or wrong in all its fullness, because that's what life is all about. I am going now to search for that quote and to remind myself about it. You’ve definitely hit the bulls eye with this one Bobby. Your post have reminded me of Walt Whitman’s verse where he said that he had accepted both – good or wrong in all its fullness, because that’s what life is all about. I am going now to search for that quote and to remind myself about it.

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