After my previous story, The Fruity Pebbles Nightmare, I felt like I needed to share a picture of Maria. Like I said, she was kicked in the face by a Clydesdale horse and doesn’t look right. She did win Ms. Aberrant Oddity 2008 at the Mississippi state fair – it was quite wonderful. Her family rents her out to children’s birthday parties for $1500.00, which is a really good price. They fill her face with pistachio ice-cream, using her as a human serving bowl – the kids always get a real kick out of it. She is really nice, but it totally freaks me out when she smokes…I wish I had a copy of the video. I often tease her by asking, “Does your face hurt?”
She howls like an injured walrus, shaking her head ‘no’. Everyone giggles (except her) and I reply, “No? Well it’s killing me.”
freakish femalien
Can you guess which female celebrity this actually is? I did this photo manipulation with the gimp on Gentoo Linux – I hope it’s not too bizarre for you. I think it’s the weirdest picture I’ve ever seen.
#1 by Debbie Dolphin at August 8th, 2008
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Did you deface Celine Dion?
#2 by teeni at August 8th, 2008
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Angelina Ho, I mean Jolie?
#3 by Revellian at August 9th, 2008
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@Debbie: Haha…no, it’s not Celine Dion. I cannot pick on her – she’s already messed up from marrying that old guy who molested her as a child. I always felt bad for her and hoped that she got help!
@Teeni: No…it’s not Angelina Jolie. Ya know, I am not a fan of hers. She has qualities I don’t like. I think Brad Pitt should have stayed married to Jennifer Anniston (it’s not her either)!
#4 by Genie Princess at August 9th, 2008
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I know I know!!!! It’s your all-time fave girl, JESSICA ALBA!!!!! Am I right? He he he!!
Oh this was fun lol! 
#5 by Revellian at August 9th, 2008
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@Marzie: Wrong answer…hahaha! Yes, I adore Jessica Alba but this is not her!!!
#6 by dcr at August 9th, 2008
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Is it Kate Beckinsale?
#7 by Revellian at August 9th, 2008
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@Dan: Yes!!!! You are absolutely correct! Kate Beckinsale is one of my favorite actresses. You win a special prize, but I cannot tell you what it is yet (this was a secret contest). The guessing is over now, so nobody else can win. You will receive it soon
#8 by Justin Airsoft at August 11th, 2008
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Kate Beckinsale, I would have never guessed. That is a freaky picture, staring in to the hole makes me feel weird.
#9 by Revellian at August 11th, 2008
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@Justin: You’re not supposed to stare into it, you might fall in!