Revellian

Thoughts and Fiction of Bobby Revell

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Man-purse Contents Revealed

Sep 22

Posted by Bobby Revell in memes

Alrighty then, I was tagged by Marzie on this girly meme…how do things like this happen to me? Haha! I decided to go ahead and share because it takes a real man (albeit unnaturally peculiar) to show his feminine side. Here goes:

Find a safe quiet place free of significant others, nosey meme makers, priests, nuns, all things religious and men in general. (If you’re a guy just reverse this process to male and tell us about your wallet, tool box, briefcase or metro sexual accessory.)

1. Dump the contents of your handbag in a pile.
2. Take a photo of your handbag and the contents.
3. Be brave and ’splain to your fellow bloggers what lurks inside the handbag.
4. Tag others who might want to embarrass themselves.
5. Answer these questions:

Describe the contents of your handbag. Please see my response below.
What’s the most important thing in your handbag? My Hannah Montana keychain
What’s the most embarrassing thing in your handbag? KY Jelly
What’s the smallest thing in your handbag? Bullets
Is there anything illegal in your handbag? Yes, but I left it out for legal purposes

My Man-purse (metrosexual accessory) Contents

My Man-purse (metrosexual accessory) Contents

Now let me describe my contents. I didn’t actually show my metrosexual accessory, it’s quite private and I’m sensitive about showing it to everyone.

  • My gun – I use it everyday to get a better seat, a better place in line, when someone laughs at my metrosexual accessory (hey, it’s European), when a woman says no or if someone gives me a funny look. (My man-purse is a Hugo Boss with Rhinestones, made of Italian leather).
  • Lots of bullets – I go through them like water.
  • Tic Tacs – I like to have sweet, minty-fresh breath because you never know.
  • A thick stack of hundreds – It’s so sexy to sport a cash roll, everyone is impressed.
  • Ky Jelly – I don’t do dry and prefer slippery slickness
  • Hannah Montana Keychain (usually slid on my index finger) – One day, she’ll turn 18. Bobby’s waiting for you baby.

I don’t know who to tag on this one. I’ll tag Speedy, Dan, Michelle and Debbie Dolphin

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The Magic Lamp of Luck

Jul 7

Posted by Bobby Revell in memes

My good friend, The Genie Princess invited me to participate in her new Genie Meme! I usually don’t participate in many memes, but I will just for her (and the Genie King of course). She has brought me lots of good luck and is a great friend, so I am happy to oblige!

Gaze upon the Magical Lamp of Luck!

magic lamp of luck

magic lamp of luck

By participating, you will gain reciprocal links as well as increasing your Technorati authority. Another good idea is to use your chosen anchor text for added benefit. I chose Blogging Tips, which is one of the main subjects in my blog. Enjoy a wealth of magical good luck! Her previous one generated several hundred links, so join in now while it’s still new for maximum benefit.
Read the rest of this entry »

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Quirk

Jun 26

Posted by Bobby Revell in Humor, memes

What exactly is a quirk? It sounds like a grotesque, protruding nodule or growth that requires surgery, “I can’t come into work today, I have a grisly quirk on my tender inner thigh and it’s dripping fluid!”

Mr. Boss says, “Yeech…stay home. Don’t come here and spread that nasty virus…take five weeks if you need it! Powder your leg and don’t wear tight jeans for a few days”

Here’s a photo manipulation (on my Linux box with the Gimp) I did last year of my friend Randy Hover, it’s quite quirky and striking. I did several variations trying to achieve a realistic picture using  the free open source Gimp software (which is a bitch to get used to but is very powerful once you get used to it and are willing to persevere for long sessions to gain the skills needed. I didn’t plan to create a “snakeman” but his face predestinated itself into a lizard like or snake like morph:

The Birdman (has a vicious bite)

The Snakeman (has a vicious bite)

The Snakeman (has a vicious bite)

Actually, a quirk is a weird or unusual habit. I was tagged by my good friend Jean Chia on her post [5] Annoying Things + [8] Habits + [6] Quirks to participate in this meme (I must have been insane when I wrote that ridiculous meme post!) and list six quirks of mine (I didn’t do the entire meme because I’m trying to score high for the “golden fleece” of keywords: quirk. I haven’t participated in a meme in quite a while, mostly because I became burned out on them awhile back. This one sounded like fun and I wanted to share how weird I really am with all of you. I don’t list the rules because if you don’t know how to do a meme, my blog is far too advanced for you – go cut your teeth and come back later.

  1. When someone is sweating and they get that little droplet of sweat hanging off their nose, I lose control – I cannot stand it. The surmounting pressure will build in my mind until I finally snap. I once shot a man because of it. His headless body is dissolving in a bathtub in Hell’s Kitchen.
  2. I floss my teeth several times per day because I cannot stand having anything between them. I carry dental floss, a toothbrush, toothpaste and a bottle of water in my vehicle and at work in case of emergencies.
  3. I get the “piss shivers” when I urinate. Sometimes the twitch is so spastic, I shake the contact lenses off my eyes right into the toilet – $10.00 down the commode. I am told that many men suffer from this affliction…especially while peeing outside on cold nights. Is this too much information?
  4. I don’t like shaking stranger’s hands. Some people find it rude, but that’s how cold and flu germs are passed. If I do shake someone’s hand, I cannot relax until I wash them with anti-bacterial soap and hot water. I like Donald Trump’s “no handshake policy”. The Asian’s have it right with a simple bow. The perfect excuse is to say, “Pardon me if I don’t shake hands, I’m a Buddhist,” and bow politely.
  5. I sleep with the lights on because I don’t want spiders crawling all over my body and face. A good friend of mine was bitten on the eyelid by a brown recluse (be sure to read my brown recluse story). His face rotted off and he lost his left eye. Years later, it’s still a vile open sore, along with being wet and draining pus. His friends call him “the cyclops” and I don’t want to end up like him.
  6. If I drive or walk somewhere, I have to return the exact same way or my psychic cable will get entangled around everything. I was once hospitalized in a mental ward because there was a road block and I had to drive home a different route than I originally came. I never got over it and have nightmares to this day.

Rule: If you do the meme, link the text “quirk” to this post as the anchor text, this will improve my search engine ratings for that highly prized keyword.:mrgreen:

I tag the following people to reveal their six quirks (do it if you want, if not, I really just wanted to give you a link anyway:)

Marzie, Karen, Janice, Robin, Miss Money Penny, Michelle Gartner, Spaced Girl Hero, Etta Rose, Apple

Also, I want to thank Dan – DCR Blogs – for the great comments he left on my previous post How to Steal Blog Content: Ethically (check ‘em out). I learned a lot about copyright laws among other things. I learn something new every day from other bloggers. Dan is very smart and has a great site. You should take the time to meet him and check out his blog!:smile:

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17 Comments

My Six Word Blogging Memoir & Shamanic Journey

Apr 15

Posted by Bobby Revell in memes, short-story, thought

I was tagged by Mitchell Allen on his post Six Simple Sounds Summarize Self Story and Anastasia on her article 6 Word Memoir for this six word vignette to fully and accurately describe the highly distilled, purified and laboratory filtered essence of my blog. I wanted to peel back the endless layers – an exfoliation of galvanized life crust – disrobing all meaning to uncover the naked truth. I want to strip bare my blog and unsheath what lies beneath.

To get the truth, I traveled west to meet up with my half Mayan shaman, the enigmatic and powerful warlock master, Eldeguado Giovianni Menguadatucci. He has been the Revell family soothsayer for over 942 years. I met him in Sedona’s Painted desert. The ominous storm clouds gathered above as always – known as Eldeguado’s Cumulonimbus. He lives in the yellow tent-house pictured below. Unfortunately, his mule Poncho, passed away last year and he travels barefoot everywhere he goes.

eldeguado's cumulonimbus

eldeguado's cumulonimbus

I traveled there with my guide, Quentin Montana, who has been with me on many shamanic journeys. We crawled in a beautiful tepee, which sported an atmospheric Aztec motif. We sat inside, sipping the highly bitter witches brew of Datura, which contains narcotic alkaloids and is known in Sanskrit as dhattūrāḥ or thorn apple. It has long been used as an instrument for obtaining prophetic dreams or messages in various tribes. Another powerful ingredient was peyote, a spineless, dome-shaped cactus (Lophophora williamsii) native to Mexico and the southwest United States, having buttonlike tubercles that are chewed fresh or dry as a narcotic drug by certain Native American peoples. Also called mescal.

Eldeguado Guovianni Menguadatucci

Eldeguado Guovianni Menguadatucci

Eldeguado read my blog in a shamanic vision and channeled the ancient man-god Quetzalcoatl (A god of the Toltecs and Aztecs, one of the manifestations of the sun god Tezcatlipoca and represented as a plumed serpent), who appeared before me in all his kaleidoscopic glory. I melted in a river of liquid dreamscapes, tasted lemon sun rays and traversed the astral plane.

Quetzalcoatl in human form, using the symbols of Ehecatl, from the Codex Borgia

Quetzalcoatl in human form, using the symbols of Ehecatl, from the Codex Borgia

Eldeguado and I hummed the musical pitch of E flat in perfect unison. Quetzalcoatl, joined in with a spectacular operatic low A natural – together forming a thunderous tritone. The dissonance of this specific tritone (often used as the main interval of dissonance in musical harmony) further intensifies the prophetic nature of the visions. We faced at the correct mathematical angles to form a psychic epiphany, opening the gates to the netherworlds. The powerful chord resonated through the marrow of my bones, stimulating my third eye (pineal gland), allowing me to retrieve my six word memoir.

It was an incredible experience, though I have had an excruciatingly swollen medulla oblongata ever since. This would have made genius author Carlos Castaneda and his metaphoric character Don Juan proud. So…here’s my prophetic memoir, as told by Quetzalcoatl:

Psychic Voodoo Master’s Love Quest Spectacle

*Ahhh…I feel better now.
*I do not advocate drug use, this post is entirely fiction
*The spectacular desert cloud picture is Skyorclowns by Shaze2
*The beautiful blue picture with meditating man is This desert is not hot by Perfectclick
*I tag the following people to write their own six word memoir:

Paisley, Setu, Moyrn, Floog, Karen, Marzie, Haney, Miss MoneyPenny, and of course Nick Phillips

You don’t have to include a mesmerizing story, but it would be fun if you did!

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21 Comments

The True Love Tag

Apr 11

Posted by Bobby Revell in memes

I was tagged by Marzie with the True Love Tag and thought it to be important for me to do. I am so lazy with tags and only have 17,349 more to catch up!

  • What does true love mean to you?

Love is more than anything I could ever write or describe. It is the most important idea, feeling, intention or act any person can have or give. Love is in essence, the solution to every problem facing our lives. Without love, life is not worth living. It is also about risking yourself emotionally – risking everything for someone. You must take that chance to have true love.

  • How do you know you’re really in love?

I fall in love very easily, which is my biggest fault. When I can surrender, depending on someone and they reciprocate – I will have found my true love. It is elusive but I have faith I will find it.

  • How many times in your life have you fallen in love?

Far too many to count. I just haven’t found the right woman!

  • Have you ever fallen out of true love because you were mad at the moment?

No.

  • Do you feel love and physical attraction are the same thing?

No. Both must exist for it to work.

  • If your true love became ill or disfigured would you continue to love them the same way?

Yes. If you really love someone, you will do anything for them – especially in moments of despair.

  • Should anyone else be able to tell you who to love or not love?

No. However, sometimes they are right – so I will listen to wise advice and make my own choice.

  • Do you believe people that ended up divorced were ever truly in love?

Sure. People do change and things happen. Love is worth the risk.

  • Would you give up something you want for someone you love?

I would do anything for love.

  • If you truly love someone do you feel it should be unconditional?

Absolutely with total conviction.

I tag the following people, do it if you wish:

Menopauseprincess, Morgan, Paula, Christy, Tish

24 Comments

Bobby Revell’s Entertainment Week

Mar 14

Posted by Bobby Revell in memes

It’s been quite a while since I’ve completed a tag and I know I am so far behind, I’ll never catch up! Hey, it’s better late than never. My friend Todd from Success With Todd tagged me with a really cool one entitled My Entertainment Week. Just write a little under the three topics: Books, TV and Music.

Books: I love to read even more than I love to write! I actually read an E-book today that was very inspiring. It’s an old classic, The Art of Writing by Robert Louis Stevenson (click the link and get it free). This is a study of style, form, rhythm and the artistic qualities of being an author. A great read for anyone looking to spark their writing imagination.

lovecraft.png

As far as fiction goes, I am a huge H.P. Lovecraft fan. I love his book, “At The Mountains of Madness“. Another favorite from him is “The Dream-Quest of Unknown Kadath“. Lovecraft is my literary idol and I reread many of his works over and over. Click the links and read them for yourself.

weaveworld.pngI also love Clive Barker. His novel, “The Damnation Game”, is fantastic. I also liked his brilliant masterpiece, “Weaveworld“, which is more fantasy than horror. I wish he would turn it into a movie…that would be incredible. If you want to sink your teeth into a true masterpiece of fantasy, this book will not disappoint. You can download free PDF versions of Lovecraft and tons of other classics from Manybooks.net (one of my all time favorite sites). To read an entire novel from the web does take some getting used to. I prefer to read a normal book, where I can lie on the couch and relax with a blanket and pillow. Reading for three straight hours from a PC gives me a headache sometimes. It can also lessen the entire experience.

TV: Besides watching every news channel, I am addicted to the show Law and Order. I watch tons of old reruns and prefer it to CSI. It’s one of the best written TV programs ever and I think I’ve seen every episode. I particularly like the Law and Order: SVU variation. My favorite channels are The History Channel, A&E and Discovery. Overall, I really spend very little time watching TV. I spend the majority of my free time writing.

beethoven.jpgMusic: I really love mega-dramatic horror movie soundtracks cranked up to ear splitting decibel levels – in front of my wide open living room window – dressed like Beethoven…waving a symphony conductor’s baton in passionate and furious frenzy. My neighbors love me! Tonight, I’ll play my favorite, “The Exorcist” soundtrack – that should frighten the old lady next door…haha! The picture to the left (from Classical.net) is exactly how I look when conducting – I take it very seriously and so do my neighbors. If “air-conducting” ever catches on, I’ll be internationally known as the best. I’ll be Revellian: The Wicked Evil Maestro. Stand in fear as I mesmerize and take names! Hey, I already know I’m a strange cookie.

Well, maybe I stretched the truth a little in the previous paragraph. I do prefer instrumental music to music with vocals. I like instrumental progressive-metal, Jazz, classical and Indian music very much.

I look forward to reading about some of your favorite little things in life; feel free to change up if you don’t watch TV and like video games or movies more etc. I tag the following people – some of these people tagged me on meme’s I’ve yet to do, I will try to do one per week to catch up:

Mitch, Speedy, Andy, Nick, Zubli, Mike, Menopauseprincess, Paula, Christy, Square1, Anastasia, Karen, Bobo, Jamy, Trinity, Emila, Marzie, Janice, Teeni, Madhur, LFXT, DCR and Debbie Dolphin

I have a meme complex after blogging for a year. Actually, it happened around 6 months ago. I was so inundated with tags and awards that I got all stressed out and just stopped doing them. I’m finally over feeling guilty about it. I just don’t do very many of them. One blogger (DCR) pointed out that some meme’s and link chains are fun and more interesting than others. I felt that this one was interesting as it is a cool way to get to know people better. If you feel uncomfortable tagging people…don’t!

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37 Comments

Have You Seen Bobby’s Sponge?

Jan 25

Posted by Bobby Revell in memes

Cartoon Character Meme

I was tagged by Marzie to participate in this fun cartoon character meme. Although she thought I would surely be Charlie Brown (I also thought that!!!), I am: *(29-35 points) You are Sponge Bob Square Pants: You are the classic person that everyone loves. You are the best friend that anyone could ever have and never wants to lose. You never cause harm to anyone and they would never not understand your feelings. Life is a journey, it’s funny and calm for the most part. Stay away from traitors and jealous people, and you will be stress free.

sponge-bob-revellian.jpg

Answer all the questions (only 10) with what describes you best, add up all your Points (which are next to the answer that you choose) at the end and look for your results. Do not cheat by looking at the end of the e-mail before you are done.Then ask your Friends to answer it. (Make sure to Highlight your answers)

1. Which one of the following describes the perfect date?

a) Candlelight dinner (4 pts.)
b) Fun/Theme Park (2 pts.)
c) Painting in the park (5 pts)
d) Rock concert (1 pt.)
e) Going to the movies (3 pts.)

2. What is your favorite type of music?

a) Rock and Roll (2 pts.)
b) Alternative (1 pt.)
c) Soft Rock (4 pts.)
d) Country (5 pts.)
e) Pop (3 pts.)

3. What type of movies do you prefer?

a) Comedy (2 pts.)
b) Horror (1 pt.)
c) Musical (3 pts.)
d) Romance (4 pts.)
e) Documentary (5 pts.)

4. Which one of these occupations would you choose if you only could choose one of these?

a) Waiter (4 pts.)
b) Professional Sports Player (5 pts.)
c) Teacher (3 pts.)
d) Police (2 pts.)
e) Cashier (1 pt.)

5. What do you do with your spare time?

a) Exercise (5 pts.)
b) Read (4 pts.)
c) Watch television (2 pts.)
d) Listen to music (1 pt.)
e) Sleep (3 pts.)

6. Which one of the following colors do you like best?

a) Yellow (1 pt.)
b) White (5 pts.)
c) Sky Blue (3 pts.)
d) Dark Blue (2 pts.)
e) Red (4 pts.)

7. What do you prefer to eat?

a) Snow (3 pts.)
b) Pizza (2 pts.)
c) Sushi (1 pt.)
d) Pasta (4 pts.)
e) Salad (5 pts.)

8 What is your favorite holiday?

a) Halloween (1 pt.)
b) Christmas (3 pts.)
c) New Year (2 pts.)
d) Valentine’s Day (4 pts.)
e) Thanksgiving (5 pts.)

9. If you could go to one of these places which one would it be?

a) Paris (4 pts)
b) Spain (5 pts)
c) Las Vegas (1 pt)
d) Hawaii (4 pts)
e) Hollywood (3 pts)

10. With which of the following would you prefer to spend time with?

a) Someone Smart (5 pts.)
b) Someone attractive (2 pts.)
c) Someone who likes to Party (1 pt.)
d) Someone who always has fun (3 pts.)
e) Someone very sentimental (4 pts.)

*Now add up your points and find out the answer you have been waiting for!Put your character in the subject line and forward to your friends and back to the person that sent this to you. Very interesting to see ‘who’ your friends are!

*(10-16 points) You are Garfield: You are very comfortable, easy going, and you definitely know how to have fun but sometimes you take it to an extreme. You always know what you are doing and you are always in control of your life. Others may not see things as you do, but that doesn’t mean that you always have to do what is right. Try to remember, your happy spirit may hurt you or others.

*(17-23 points) You are Snoopy: You are fun, you are very cool and popular. You always know what’s in and you are never are out of style You are good at knowing how to satisfy everyone else. You have probably disappeared for a few days more than once but you always come home with the family values that you learned Being married and having children are important to you, but only after you have had your share of fun times.

*(24-28 points) You are Elmo: You have lots of friends and you are also popular, always willing to give advice and help out a person in need. You are very optimistic and you always see the bright side of things. Some good advice: try not to be too much of a dreamer. Dreaming too big could cause many conflicts in your life.

*(29-35 points) You are Sponge Bob Square Pants: You are the classic person that everyone loves. You are the best friend that anyone could ever have and never wants to lose. You never cause harm to anyone and they would never not understand your feelings. Life is a journey, it’s funny and calm for the most part. Stay away from traitors and jealous people, and you will be stress free.

*(36-43 points) You are Charlie Brown: You are tender, you fall in love quickly but you are also very serious about all relationships. You are a family person. You call your Mom every Sunday. You have many friends and may occasionally forget a few Birthdays. Don’t let your passion confuse you with reality.

*(44-50 points) You are Dexter: You are smart and definitely a thinker… Every situation is fronted with a plan. You have a brilliant mind. You demonstrate very strong family principles. You maintain a stable routine but never ignore a bad situation when it comes.

*Try to do less over thinking every once in a while to spice things up a bit with spontaneity. Now don’t spoil it! Have some Fun!!

I tag my great friends Zubli, Jean Chia, Ed Philly, Judy, and of course Paula!
HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY SHINADE!!!!!

All of the above people are my friends and am very proud of it.

The picture is from Danusia.

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16 Comments

Love Hate Circumambulate

Jan 12

Posted by Bobby Revell in Humor, memes

I was tagged by Marzie and Bobo on this love hate meme (a replicating post that moves from blog to blog building a chain of links and relies on propagation through tagging a new list of bloggers to join in – the Revellian definition…hehe)

1. I love to eat: Thinker’s Tripe – butter sauteed medulla oblongata drizzled over a bed of freshly slaughtered sheep brains…yummy!
2. I hate to eat: with some weirdo staring at me
3. I love to go: inside a warm home when my keeper allows me
4. I hate to go: beddie bye without a bowl of chocolate ice cream
5. I love it when: A chef washes his hands before handling my food
6. I hate it when: A grubby, unbathed and stinky person coughs into their hand and then wants to shake mine…gross!!!!
7. I love to see: beyond…with my third eye
8. I hate to see: ugly hairs hanging from someone’s nostrils
9. I love to hear: the terrifying sounds of a violent thunderstorm…yeah!!!
10. I hate to hear: alcoholic police officers talking bad about crackheads

I tag nobody but do it if you want!

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15 Comments