Posts Tagged friendship

Endless Thanks To Jennifer

Jennifer, author of Writing To Survive has featured me as her February Blog of the Month–please check out the article, it is wonderful. Go visit her and read her work. She is truly a great writer with a distinctive style overflowing in heart, tears and depth–something rare in the blogosphere.

As I told her, I’ve always felt like a black sheep blogger. I don’t feel like I fit in any where–in any cliques and so on. There are many different writing based communities and little groups of writers, but I don’t feel welcome in their inner circles. Many fiction writers are snobbish and pretentious, have stilted opinions of what good is and why some work is garbage. I’m more open–meaning I read all genres and can appreciate everything from romance, erotic noir to horror to sentimental stories of personal triumph and all between. The more fearless of ridicule a writer is, the more I like them. I say write unapologetically regardless of fallout–and your readers will gather.

In high school and college, my literature professors degraded me while bathing other writers in limelight–not because they were skilled, but because of what they wrote about. It really hurt. I was taught that a descriptive sex scene, extreme profanity, first person perspective of murder or cannibalism is both immoral and automatically brands it rubbish–makes it trashy and low class. I rebelled . . . did I ever rebel.

I became an extremist writer. I will never write to be popular.

I often write things other people are afraid to write or disgusted by . . . probably because society says it’s wrong in many respects. I’m really fortunate to have friends and fans who actually read my more questionable content–that appreciate my craft and how much care I place in each sentence, each individual word–even if the story is sickening or terrifying. I only know one thing: I love to write (and read).

Thank you Jennifer from the bottom of my heart for shining a little limelight on little ol’ me. It means a lot and I will never forget it.

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Why I’m Not a Money Blogger

Blogging has evolved just as societies have throughout history. What makes blogging unique, is that it encompasses the entire world, all of us together under one technology; worldwide communication with everyone using the written word.

I’ve been blogging for almost one year and I have explored intensely, learning all I can. Blogging is the only “society” where we are all together and still, we separate ourselves into cliques, groups and hierarchy. Already, bloggers are divided which is such a shame.

After looking at all of my options in what I choose to express…my chosen identity, who I am as a blogger and what is truly important; I choose to be a personal blogger who tries hard to initiate and cultivate worldwide friendships.

I’ve met just about every type of blogger and have tried to become friends with them all. One thing that stands out is that it’s very difficult to become friends with a “money blogger”. This is why I am not one. If someone makes $15,000.00 per month and has a highly ranked blog…they don’t read my blog.

Why don’t they read my blog or maybe your blog? Because we have nothing to offer them in the way of making more money. We are insignificant and the ones they prey on to earn a buck. I have yet to successfully become friends with a money blogger, yet I have tried!

“If it’s impossible to become your friend, I will probably not read your blog.”

The one thing I feel great about is that I have kept most of the friends I met when I first started. To me, a true money blogger isn’t a blogger…they are websites using the blog medium to disguise themselves as friends. Does this statement offend some of you?

We, the blogging masses have all the real power, which is universal friendship. Friendships free from the constraints of religious, political and geographical separation. This is the most incredible attribute inherent to this technology. When you throw money into the mix, it changes things.

Money doesn’t inspire me. It doesn’t excite me and it never will. People and life inspire me. Art, literature and good friendship inspires me. Blogging has inspired me to be a better person. The Internet has become a place of education to me, I use it to learn something new everyday.

Some of you may be thinking, “I’m a money blogger and I thought we were friends!”

Haha…we are friends, but you aren’t making $10,000 per month with your blog either. If you were, chances are, you wouldn’t be reading this blog! Making money with your blog doesn’t make you a money blogger. A money blogger is one who writes exclusively about how to make money on his or her blog…the most uninteresting subject I know of.

However, I could be friends with a money blogger…that’s up to them, not me. I’ll be friends with anyone willing!

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How To Provide Traffic For Others

I see so many people trying hard to earn traffic for their own blogs, it’s natural. As humans, we like attention. We want to feel important and our work has some sort of validation. Often, with this mindset, we miss out on what is truly important.

“It is like a finger pointing away to the moon. Do not concentrate on the finger or you will miss all that heavenly glory…”

Bruce Lee

I suppose I sometimes see things from an opposite point of view compared to many people. That’s why I never really fit in while growing up, and in school. Whenever I saw the majority herd like sheep around the latest fad or coolest clique – I ran the opposite direction.

When we write about how to gain traffic, we are really out to gain traffic for ourselves. We rationalize, believing we are teaching others how to gain traffic – we are really teaching others to be greedy, just like we are! I see money bloggers often believing they help others by teaching them to make money…they are really just trying to make money for themselves!

If you seek out new bloggers (meaning a blog just started by a novice), what is your intention? Is it to gain a link? Is it to sell them something? Is it to truly make a friend? I am just looking to make a friend.

Some Thoughts on Technorati

Let’s set the record straight on Technorati. If I link to you, you gain +1 in authority. If I link to you 1000 times, it still only counts +1. I cannot add 2 or more points to another blog’s authority. That link will last 180 days! After 180 days, it no longer counts! So…you can fight to raise it, but it is only temporary!

A friendship lasts longer than 180 days, definitely something to think about! This is why I never check my stats…it’s the most irrelevant information in the universe.

Give The Gift Of Reading

“For anyone wondering how they’d go about looking for new blogs, look at MyBlogLog’s list of new blogs. That will get you started :grin:

Brown Baron

Read other blogs and leave them comments. Read blogs in many different categories, other than your own! Brown Baron recommended to read blogs listed in the new blogs section on MyBlogLog. Don’t go hit these new folks with a sales pitch or asking for a digg or stumble!

When you visit a blog, you are entering their home! It’s like going to someone’s house for dinner. Have some freaking manners! Read their blog…it’s the greatest gift to give :smile:

Link to cool unknown posts from other bloggers. Most people link to the same blogs, usually the big, well known blogs. For crying out loud, the big blogs have enough links. It’s like sending an expensive present to a multi millionaire. I’m often amazed when I see a restaurant give free meals to famous stars. Why do they do that? Feed a starving child for free and charge the star!

Don’t Be An Expert

When I started blogging, I didn’t have any readers. So, I started reading about how to get readers. One of the things that stuck in my mind was the recommendation that being known as an “expert” is good for traffic.

When someone claims to be an expert, they come off as not an expert. Experts don’t claim to be experts. A true expert is one who realizes they are but a beginner, no matter how much they know. If you are an expert, let others say it, don’t say it yourself.

I remember the 1st time I heard someone talking about their glass being half full. Immediately, I thought they were referring to Zen philosophy. Hahaha…they weren’t! A glass half full means optimistic, half empty means pessimistic (live and learn…hehe).

I say the glass is always empty, as my mind is always empty…detached from the situation. If you want an in depth explanation of detachment, read my post, Beyond Thought II: Detachment. The western mind is often a full glass. There’s no more room in that glass for new knowledge. Claiming to be an expert is a pure expression of being a “know it all”.

“Remember this. The traffic you give is better than the traffic you receive…”

Don’t be an expert…BE YOURSELF!

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Dedication – Two Lovely Ladies

Trinity

I am really late in the completion of my Blogging For Friendship project so I have decided to do it differently than originally planned. I will cover a few participants at a time so I can really give them some much deserved attention!

Starting in no particular order, I choose Trinity! Trinity is a relatively new friend of mine but I feel like I have known her for years. She writes a wonderful blog titled, Rooms of My Heart. It is both a personal and business blog that covers just about everything you could think of.

Her post was Thank You For Your Friendship, which was a delight to read and was written with a lot of love. Here’s a quote from her post:

There’s also a really special room for my friends, in real world as well as in blogsphere. God has given me so many special friends to make my world more beautiful and meaningful.

Trinity defines being a friend every day with all of her readers. If you want to make a great friend, go visit her and you will meet one of the most wonderful women in the blogosphere!

She created a wonderful badge in honour of her friends and I really loved it, check it out! Thanks Trinity :smile:

friendship.jpg

Bobo

Next, my very good friend Bobo really surprised me with her great posts, that’s right, two posts! Her Blog is BrainyBimbo and it is one I just can’t miss! She is a beautiful girl with a big heart who writes with a style unlike anyone. It’s funny, sad, exciting and everything in between.

Bobo has really become a great friend to me and she really cares about her readers. Her posts are, Part One and Bobo’s Contribution to the Blogging for Friendship Writing Project. Here’s a quote:

We prioritise differently, love different wonders and admire different people. We have different problems, think of different solutions and experience different backlashes.

We cook differently, eat different food and name the same dish differently. We sing different songs, tap to different tunes and play different instruments. We draw different things, paint with different colours and embrace different cultures.

We’re all different. Truly unique. and because of that…We’re one and the SAME.

Her post was very creative and sparkles with personality. I had really just met her shortly before the project began and I didn’t know if she would participate or not. She took it seriously and wrote two wonderful pieces which made my day :smile:

Thank you Bobo, you are a great friend!!!!

I’ll be dedicating posts to everyone who participated for 3-4 weeks. Friendship in the blogosphere is something we can never write enough about. We bloggers have taken the idea of on line friends to a level beyond what any of us could have dreamed.

We need each other and bloggers take friendship very seriously. I know firsthand how wonderful it is to have people that care from every place on Earth. Thanks to Trinity and Bobo for their dedication to nurturing meaningful relationships with everyone who comes their way. Please go visit these two beautiful, intelligent and caring ladies, please say hello. You’ll be glad you did :mrgreen:

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The Blogging For Friendship Writing Project

A Project To Promote Our Community

This project was born out of necessity. I am fully against Google and their page rank system. I believe it is the people that count, not Google. I use Yahoo for all of my searches now and I will ask all of you to do the same thing (any search engine but Google). This project is to promote blogging friendships and the betterment of humanity.

My site is considered completely irrelevant by them. Is what I write irrelevant? Be warned that answers.com also uses Google. I am done with Google. I will keep my Gmail account and that�s it. I will publish a post listing all the posts on Saturday, October 27th.

The rules are simple. Write a post promoting goodness and friendship in the blogosphere. If some of you have any ideas on how or why Google should be boycotted, by all means, please do so. Keep in mind this isn�t about hating Google, it�s about solutions and friendships.

Once you are done, leave me a comment with the url of your post. Be creative and show your love! I am tagging a lot of you! Feel free to double tag the same people. That�ll make it even better. You don�t have to tag anyone if you don�t want to. Write something positive for our friendship and the betterment of humanity. Don�t do it for me, do it for everyone! Here�s my contribution:

Why I Love My Blogging Friends

I was going to write a post full of little stories about each of my blogging friends. Inevitably, the post would be 30 pages and someone would be left out. I have written a more general post to avoid length. I will be dedicating individual posts to and about all my friends regularly in upcoming articles.

Blogging to me is about sharing and caring. The incredible people I have met are some of the the finest people I have ever known. I have three new friends that have touched my heart so much this week, I have to mention them. All of you have touched my heart! I am already feeling guilty for not mentioning hundreds of you :cry:

My friend Rolando from RPlayground has been so heavily influential on me I am without words. He inspires me to be a better human being. My friend Jamilla from What I Feel, I Just Blog It is so giving to everyone she meets it is truly heartwarming. She�s a shining star! My friend Opal Tribble|Vegan Momma is a great woman who just lights up the blogosphere with her kindness!

If you don�t know these people, go meet them! The visit will leave you filled with warmth and happiness.

The people who are changing the face of blogging are super friendly, kind and caring! WOW! I am so excited right now it is amazing. We are helping make the world a better place. It�s happening right now. I�m going for a new niche because it is now the time. Blogging Ethics|Blogging Friendships!

My first good friend on line was Adria from the blog InCinq. I didn�t really have any friends when I met her. She just stepped into my world and changed my entire view of blogging. She is a great, talented blogger who is definetly worth knowing! Thanks Adria! If it weren�t for you, I wouldn�t be blogging.

The next person I became friends with is Marzie (Genie Princess) from Mariuca: Wishing on a Falling Star. Marzie is very giving and has been so good to me. She taught me how to comment and I look up to her for being so nice to everyone! Again, I wouldn�t be blogging if it weren�t for her! These two women are some of the web�s finest!!!!!

Alright, I wasn�t going to write about these people originally but it is just coming out this way.

The Nafasg team are the finest group of people running one blog on the entire Internet. I cannot say enough good things about them! If you visit them, they will not disappoint you! They are helping lead the charge for helping humanity! We are all helping in our own way.

I have decided to not take this blog in a financial direction. The truth is, it doesn�t fit. It doesn�t feel right. Maybe I will start a money blog but it will not be this one. I am officially giving up on Google. I�m here for my friends. It�s all that matters to me. Blogging isn�t about money. it�s about community.

It�s time to get serious about Global change for the betterment of humanity. NOTHING is more important than that. I don�t care about money. I cannot care about a piece of paper. If you do, get some help. We need money but should not care about it. You care about people and kittens, not money!

There are over 100 million bloggers. We should support each other and make a group effort to spread love, not war. We can complain about the World�s issues but it won�t help. Instead of writing a 1000 posts about why George Bush should be impeached, promote positivity instead.

This blog promotes goodness. I try to avoid pointing out problems.

We Are One People

Instead of writing about how different we are, I am about how similar we are. It’s great to be proud of your heritage. What I am telling you is that I am proud to be a human being from the planet Earth. Being a white guy from the United States gives me a responsibility. I am part of the majority here. That’s why I support all races.

I’ll say it like this:

There are hardly any white Americans supporting the minorities here. That’s a big problem. I hear white people complaining about how there are too many immigrants. WE ARE ALL IMMIGRANTS FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!!!!!!!!! This is America. We are the melting pot. It makes me sick that people think they are special or better than others.

Who’s fault is it that minority based neighborhoods have high crime rates? It is the white Americans who display the disease of racism. We are not making everyone feel welcome here! They are welcome here. I stand here and proudly say I love all people from all races and religions. We are all equals.

If you think I’m wrong, please get some help. Make some friends with a blog. You will find how much alike all of us are. Before blogging, I was missing out on so many things. We are all here together. This blogging platform is such a powerful medium of communication it is unbeliveable.

Who would have ever dreamed how much of an impact blogging would have? It is simply awesome. I stand as one person with all of you. We are in this thing together. Let us all stand together, regardless of where were from. Let’s join as one race. We are the human race!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I’m not feeling very well right now and I have to cut this article much shorter than I want to. There are lots of my friends not listed. I love each and everyone of you. I think I may have the flu so I will get some rest. I always feel guilty for not writing a hundred page post about all of you’I will be dedicating posts to all of you coming up.

I am asking the following people to participate in this project. There are really no rules. Do what you want. It’s about the community as a whole and all the wonderful individual people in it. Thank you all for being my friends. The following list of great people are all great bloggers whom I will support until my last breath :razz:

What can we do to change the world? Why are your blogging friends important to you? How can bloggers help to prevent wars? These are just a few questions to consider when writing. Try not to write a super long post. Bloggers tend to like shorter more concise articles. If you do want to write a 200 page thesis, go ahead! I will read it but I can’t promise you that every one will.

I didn’t want a linked badge when starting this project. My friends Nafasg made a nice badge but it only linked to them. In lieu of these cicumstances, I felt terrible telling them that I couldn’t use it. I buckled down and a little html to fix everything! Thanks Nafa! Here’s to humanity! Trinity also made one! ThanksTrinity!

Blogging For Friendship
Badge By NAFASG

Ordinary Folk

Sexualite

EuroYank

Brown Baron

Emila Yusof

Antiokid

Anything Goes!

Jeanchia

Feedget

Yasmin

Random Magus

No Weeping Allowed

Christy�s Coffee Break

Mariuca – Wishing On A Falling Star

Zubli3

Zubli1

Lynda�s Loft

Joezul

Disjointed Intelligence

Wannabewino

TheSkySoBlah

Orient Lounge

InCinq

Lyndas Loft

Nellioness

Loonarlanding

Why Paisley

Rightly Epitomized

Beamansworld

Blogozine

Zubli2(BookProject)

Seiche

HollyGL

Polliwogspond

Nihals Anything&Everything

Twist & Skewer

ChattieKat

A Circle of Women

Janice

Jesse The Cat

Sunrays and Saturdays

Illusionaire

Aaron Cook.com

Walks Far Woman

First Time Dad

Wolfgang

Bobobimbo

Whiteboy Style

My Unique Life

Mentarch

Nafasg

On Line Room

Me and my Drum

Mahesha

People in the Sun

Huma B

Monday Morning Power

Bush Mackel

Speedcat Hollydale

Eye Heart Internet

Vegan Momma

Waterlearner

What I Feel, I Just Blog it

RPlayground

Inside Candy

Commonsense with Markk

TheMiracleProcess.com

HughHollowell.net

Pajama Professional

Project Heavy Traffic 2.0

The Laid Back Buddhist

Pink Internet Marketing

New England Lighthouse Blog

Lighthouse-news.com

Intotheinkpot.com

BlogsWeLuv

Menopauseprincess

Spiff The Spaceman

Earthworld

Antibarbie.net

Lisa C Writes

Vivian Walters

Chimeric Daydreams

Vegan Momma

7Confessions

Laketrees

Andy Bailey

Court Tuttle

kate blogs about . .

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Reality Niche This

I see so many new bloggers and many newly aware bloggers are being feeling a lack of purpose. Don’t compare yourselves to the experts hunting a niche and being taught to be lost followers. I am beginning to hate the word niche.

Many mega-blogs with 20,000+ subscribers are boring and there are too many. And I am not talking about Andy Beard’s Niche Marketing blog Andy is a nice guy who converses with his readers and has personality. I have had a lot of feedback from newbies everywhere as they let me know that my advice was meaningful and heartfelt. It’s too bad for blogs who ignore the little people out here.

New bloggers are a “investment” link. Sure they maybe unranked newbies, but if 40 unranked newbies I link to and inspire to grow – and become friends, they may be the ignored superstars you so greedily missed out on. While so many seek to be associated with the big blogs like envious sheep, I ignore most of them and seek where the real power is; the mass public of novices.

If we all follow the experts advice, there will remain a small group of leaders and a massive group of followers. Why do we let a small percentage of people run things? Turn around! The millions of people who could easily, with team work, drop that group with a mouse click and take over!

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To My Blogging Friends

bobby-1.JPG

This to me, is the most important post I have ever written. I want to talk about a few things that have literally changed my outlook on blogging and my life.

The main thing in blogging that makes it so special are the people you meet along the way. You have friends in real life and then you have your blogging friends. Is there a difference to you? It’s much like real life in the blogosphere; you have your good friends and you have many acquaintances. I have made some blogging friends that I have true feelings for when it comes to friendship. These are the same feelings I have for people in my everyday life, for they are real people and many of us forget that. Many of us try so hard for big numbers and high hopes of making it big, but don’t let that corrupt your heart.

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Blogging Under The Influence

The past three weeks have been overwhelming as I went from 200 total page views (most only for one second using blogexplosion) in the four months since I started to over 900 in just a few weeks. It’s overwhelming because with so many new friends and contacts I feel like I am neglecting a lot of them. I will get to know each and everyone of you as time passes. There is something to be learned and shared with everyone regardless of what they write. When you have thousands of friends like some popular well known blogs you can’t be as personal with everyone; and they understand that. When you read someones blog you get to know them in a very different way than on the street. I’m not reading and writing blogs for numbers or money though many are. Even so, really making the effort and knowing each individual will create a closeness and loyalty that even those using this platform to cash in would benefit. If you are running a business you should make twice the effort for friendship. I may actually buy something at that point.

You learn the way things work everyday, new ways, better ideas and more productive ways to shape progression along this dynamically evolving beast of communication. Last year I wasn’t really sure what a blog was though I’ve been writing for years. Now I bask in this education of endless depths and deal with all that may come. After years of depression and my recently departed girlfriend I have purpose and refining it every moment to selflessly do what I believe I must. I have written hundreds of poems, mostly dark reflections of someone who hated himself. I wrote things that would petrify my friends and they thought I just wrote sick, hatred filled horror fantasies. I for some reason am no longer able to write this way as I can only write what naturally comes. There are not enough writers tackling issues that will benefit the world and educate them. Everyone has a contribution and finding it is important to me. I want to spread positivism and a friendly hand to all people. Perhaps writing about current news events and the latest ram chip is not my cup of tea. We bloggers have an obligation to help humanity in every way. I think that children should be taught and required to blog as soon as they can read.

Writers tend to be introspective and perceive life in ways that can only be learned from writing. It is an art and if it’s not then it should be. I have always loved art, music, poetry and anything which embodies human expression. Writing computer programs is an art. I should say great programmers who transcend limitations and discover on their own that which seduces them. I don’t write to get to any level or final goal as discovering and expanding is my reason.

What do you think about grammar school children being taught to blog? It puts men in a position where they are forced to learn much that some men would be ashamed to admit. I’ve known guys who were embarrassed to be seen walking their young children in public. They wouldn’t tell their wives or mothers they loved them in public view. Well were not talking about men, were talking about psychologically deformed full grown men with underdeveloped minds.
Men who hypothetically blogged from childhood would understand their “feminine” side. A man of honor and respect for all people has to be balanced in his feminine nature because if not he is a pig. Men say they don’t understand women and of course they won’t see things from a woman’s perspective but feminine traits they can learn. It is stressed to boys that this is to be avoided at all costs. They are taught don’t cry, be a man. When grown, their chances for an under developed psyche is much worse.

I am in touch with the feminine side of my being because like all men it is half of who we are. Like yin-yang or dark and light men have both sides. If not, then there is a problem. We see it every day. Any man who tenderly cares for a baby and wife and treats her with respect is in touch with his feminine nature. These are the real men. Were taught that a feminine nature means you are gay or a sissy. That is a shameful stomach wrenching lesson for any young boy to learn. I thank God I had a family that raised me the best they could. We weren’t rich but we were loved.
Let me know what you think.

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